“It being a matter of business, I trust that no apology will be deemed necessary for what might otherwise be termed an abrupt introduction of myself to your notice; at the same time I am anxious to escape any thing like the censure of rudeness on my part; but, in consequence of your advertisement respecting the publication of a new Magazine on the 2nd of May, I have taken the liberty of offering my humble services as a contributor towards its novelty.
“The title, Sir, permit me to observe, is good, which is half the battle won; but, nevertheless, the ‘Metropolitan’ will have his work to do in this age, or rather, ‘march of intellect;’ and high, thorough-bred cattle will be wanted on the prolific road of literature to get over the ground with celebrity, amidst a host of competitors and ill-natured and persecuting oppositions to the end of the chapter. Yet, under the guidance of a skilful charioteer, who can mount the box like a whip of the first quality, and use the lash with judgment, who can also handle the ribbons well, keep the literary tits to their work, make them all pull together, and always be on the right side of the road, afraid of nothing on the turf or turnpike, but giving the ‘go-by’ like nothing else but a good one, upsets in a great measure will be prevented—the journey not only rendered complete
LITERARY AND PERSONAL. | 25 |
“The ‘Metropolitan’ will have a fine and fertile field for his feather; and now and then the graver might be employed on rich ideas, giving to ‘airy nothings a local habitation and a name,’ with great effect—to catch the manners as they rise, morning, noon, and night! But, Sir, ‘be not classical over-much!’ Let the quill of the ‘Metropolitan’ be exercised to please all classes of society—the lower—the ‘middling,’ if you like the term better—as well as the upper stories of the domus—i.e., let no article be ‘caviare’ to the million! Common sense against the field. Be at all, aye, all times hand and glove with Sterne as to sentiment; also as inquisitive upon all subjects as ‘Paul Pry,’ to hold the mirror up to life and nature; but, believe, Mr. ‘Metropolitan,’ of the ghosts of Tom and Jerry; thanks to the new police, they have been laid for some time past; watching and larking are likewise at an end; and the ‘peep-o’-day boys’ have long since gone to roost!
“Of all things, Sir, (but, if I dare not take the liberty to advise, I only mean to hint) let not the ‘Metropolitan’ frighten his readers with ponderous Greek quotations (both Porson and Dr. Parr having retired to the tombs of their ancestors); neither let him put the blush upon them with numerous Latin sentences; and, likewise, teach him to steer clear of interlarding his paragraphs with French words. But, if it
26 | FIFTY YEARS’ RECOLLECTIONS, |
“I flatter myself, Sir, that your good sense, kindness, and ‘encouragement to literature,’ will pardon the above ideas hastily put together; but my intercourse with the world for the last twenty years, and also with the press, has taught me to know that a man may be the refined, stately critic in his closet, and as erudite in his language as a Johnson, or a Horne Tooke, over his pen and ink; but in his intercourse with those creatures who ‘strut and fret’ their hours in the public walks of society, respecting a knowledge of men and manners, I have too often found them as ‘flat as a pan-cake’ as to description, or little better than a mere learned idiot. However, I trust I shall see the ‘Metropolitan’ prove himself entitled to the character of a well-bred gentleman, conversant upon all subjects that can elevate him in the minds of all classes of readers.
“Being tolerably well acquainted with metropolitan scenes and public characters, I feel quite satisfied a variety of subjects might be ‘hit off’ to please and interest the public in general. Mistake me not, Sir, I do not mean in the ‘slang’ style; no, no: there are actors to be found who can throw off the character by the dress; or, as the late facetious Peter Pindar has well observed:
LITERARY AND PERSONAL. | 27 |
A picture that is called light! Psha! monstrous—a perfect fright! No—let some darkness be display’d And learn to balance well with shade! |
“But, Sir, if you should entertain a second thought on what I have hastily written to you, as to an engagement for eight, twelve, or sixteen pages, monthly, more or less, a line addressed as under will meet with due attention; but, whether or not, I wish the ‘Metropolitan’ may become a fixed star in the literary hemisphere; and its brilliancy of talent, and excellence of taste, be acknowledged to remain as such by the greatest of all patrons—the patronage of the public. I have the honor to remain,