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Lady Morgan’s Memoirs
Thomas Wallace to Sydeny Owenson, [1810?]
INTRODUCTION & INDEXES
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Preface
Vol. I Contents.
Prefatory Address
Chapter I
Chapter II
Chapter III
Chapter IV
Chapter V
Chapter VI
Chapter VII
Chapter VIII
Chapter IX
Chapter X
Chapter XI
Chapter XII
Chapter XIII
Chapter XIV
Chapter XV
Chapter XVI
Chapter XVII
Chapter XVIII
Chapter XIX
Chapter XX
Chapter XXI
Chapter XXII
Chapter XXIII
Chapter XXIV
Chapter XXV
Chapter XXVI
Chapter XXVII
Chapter XXVIII
Chapter XXIX
Chapter XXX
Chapter XXXI
Chapter XXXII
Chapter XXXIII
Chapter XXXIV
Chapter XXXV
Chapter XXXVI
Chapter XXXVII
Chapter XXXVIII
Vol. I Index
Vol. II Contents
Chapter I
Chapter II
Chapter III
Chapter IV
Chapter V
Chapter IV
Chapter VII
Chapter VIII
Chapter IX
Chapter X
Chapter XI
Chapter XII
Chapter XIII
Chapter XIV
Chapter XV
Chapter XVI
Chapter XVII
Chapter XVIII
Chapter XIX
Chapter XX
Chapter XXI
Chapter XXII
Chapter XXIII
Chapter XXIV
Chapter XXV
Chapter XXVI
Chapter XXVII
Chapter XXVIII
Chapter XXIX
Chapter XXX
Chapter XXXI
Chapter XXXII
Chapter XXXIII
Chapter XXXIV
Chapter XXXV
Chapter XXXVI
Chapter XXXVII
Chapter XXXVIII
Chapter XXXIX
Chapter XL
Vol. II Index
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[No date.]

I cannot tell you, my sweet friend, how much pleasure your letter has given me! not because you have been panegyrizing me to your great friends,—nor because I have any, the most remote fancy, that those panegyrics can ultimately produce benefits to your friend; but because the unsought, disinterested, spontaneous testimonies of friendship, are with me above all value! Even if they were not rare they would be precious,—but when one who has seen as much of mankind as myself, and knows, au fond, how seldom a heart or a head can be found that is not exclusively occupied with its own cares, or pleasures, or interests; when such a one meets an instance of gratuitous and friendly solicitude about the interests or reputation of an absent connection, he gets a new consciousness of the value of his existence, by finding there is something in his species better than he expected. I profess to you to feel a sentiment of that kind from this last instance of your recollection of me; for I am so far a misanthrope, that I should not have been much surprised if a volatile little girl like yourself, fond of the pleasure and of the admiration of society, should have forgotten such a thing as myself, when immersed in the various enjoyments of such a circle as you are now surrounded by; not that I doubted you had friendship for me,—for of that I would have been
398 LADY MORGAN'S MEMOIR.  
certain; but I would have been easily persuaded that present pleasure might, for a time, have superseded memory, and postponed a recollection of distant friends and past scenes till a more convenient season. I confess, however, my sweet friend, that I entertained some fear that your zeal may have carried you a little too far in the conversation you mention; for anything in the way of solicitation or canvass would certainly, my dear
Sydney, be to me one of the most mortifying things on earth; it would be at war with all my feelings and outrage all my principles; for there is but one thing in this world of which I can be vain—and it is a source of pleasure which nothing would induce me to forego—a consciousness that whatever I am, or whatever little success I may have in life, it is the pure and unmixed result of my own labours, uncherished and unpatronised. One instance only occurred in the course of my life, in which any attempt was made to promote my interests by the solicitation of friendship, and that became a source of great vexation to me,—it was that Mr. C. adverted to when he spoke of Ponsonby. Grattan, meaning to do a kind thing for me without my knowledge, applied to T. when he became Chancellor for a silk gown for me, and having got what he considered an explicit promise, he then mentioned the thing publicly, and it was known to half the profession before I heard of it. T. afterwards falsified his promise—by pretending that the promise was not for the next creation of king’s counsel, but for the next but one. The consequence was the open declaration of war I made upon him—which most probably will for ever prevent
BARON’S COURT399
me and Chancellors from being very good friends; for those fellows, like other classes of men, have a certain esprit de corps, and make common cause. Speak of me, therefore, dear Sydney, as your friend as much as you please, praise me in that character as far as you can, and you confer an honour on me of which I shall ever be most proud; but beware, my sweet girl, of patronage or solicitation. Here has been twenty times too much of myself; but you have made the subject valuable by the attention you have paid to it.

What is the meaning of your question, “What are you to do with the rest of your life?” Can it be possible that a mind like yours should prove itself so feeble, that the passing enjoyments of a few months in “splendour and comfort” would disgust you with the ordinary habits of the world? This would be neither reason, nor philosophy, nor good taste; for good taste is good sense directed in a particular way; and good sense has a very assimilating quality and always fits us for “existing circumstances.” I do hope, notwithstanding the horror with which you seem to look at your descent from the pedestal, that you will be capable of enjoying the circumscribed, social, laughing, wise, foolish, playful little suppers which Mrs. * * * has given us, and, I hope, will again. By the way, when will you return? Mrs. Lefanu told me, on Saturday, you mentioned to her that you would be here in a fortnight and go back; and yet Mrs. C. knows nothing of it—nor I. I cannot help recurring again to your question, What will you do with the rest of life? I put the interrogatory to myself when I read your
400 LADY MORGAN'S MEMOIR.  
letter,—indeed, I have often asked myself the question—and what do you think I am likely to do? Most probably I shall retire to some very remote spot, where a small income will be an independence—and what then? J. W.