“The pleasure I felt at hearing of your safe arrival
[in Ireland] was a good deal damped by the account you gave of the
captain’s brutality. By this time I hope all the effects of so
disagreeable a voyage are gone off, except your being a little weather-beaten
or so; and you and I don’t think that of much consequence, we have met
with so many rough blasts that have sunk deeper than the skin. You need not
have made any apology to me about the old man. When I entreated you, my dear
George, to be prudent, I only meant
to caution you against throwing your money away on trifling gratifications, but
I did not wish to narrow your heart or desire you to avoid relieving the
present necessities of your fellow-creatures, in order to ward off any future
ill which might happen to self. It would give me great
pleasure to hear there was any chance of your getting some employment. In the
meantime give way to hope, do your duty and leave the rest to Heaven, forfeit
not that sure support in the time of trouble, and though your want
| 174 | WILLIAM GODWIN |
“Palmer has been respited, and of
course will be pardoned. I have made many inquiries concerning the affair that
alarmed us so much, and find that Palmer’s servant
has sworn a child to you, and that it was on that account those men came to our
house. The girl was waiting at a little ale-house near us, so that if you had
stayed, you would have been involved in a pretty piece of business that your
innocence could not have extricated you out of. I suppose the child is
P.’s, or many fathers may dispute the honour.
Let that be as it will, the recent affair of Mary Ann
would have given this some colour of truth. How troublesome fools are!
Mrs Campbell—who has all the constancy that attends on
folly, and in whose mind, when any prejudice is fixed, it remains for ever—has
long disliked you, and this confined ill-humour has at last broken out, and she
has sufficiently railed at your vices, and the encouragement I have given them.
. . . I have been very ill, and gone through the usual physical operations,
have been bled and blistered, yet still am not well; my harassed mind will in
time wear out my body. I have been so hunted down by cares, and see so many
that I must encounter, that my spirits are quite depressed. I have lost all
relish for life, and my almost broken heart is only cheered by the prospect of
death. I may be years a-dying tho’, and so I ought to be patient, for at
this time to wish myself away would be selfish. Your father and mother are
well, and desire their love; the former has received a letter from Fanny, but her letters to your father are
seldom satisfactory to me. I am trying to get your father a place, but my hopes
are very faint. I forgot to tell you that Palmer’s
servant says she followed you one day in town and raised a mob, but that you
ran away. God bless you, and believe me sincerely and affectionately your
friend. I feel that I love you more than I ever supposed that I did. Adieu to
the village delights. I almost hate the Green, for it seems the
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