8 | AN AUTOBIOGRAPHY. |
Time rolls her ceaseless course! The race of yore
That danced our infancy upon their knee,
And told our marvelling boyhood legends store
Of their strange ventures happed by land or sea;
How are they blotted from the things that be!—Scott.
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There is a place in childhood that I remember well.—Lover.
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Although my birth, parentage, and education cannot pretend to public interest, yet as they are requisite for the development of my design, I claim excuse for devoting a space to them; and if I then hasten more in medias res for the sake of later affairs, it will not be without an intention of retracing my steps at a future period, should circumstances attendant upon this publication warrant the retrospect. At present, perhaps, some critics may fancy I have said more than enough on the subject: but it illustrates more than “Sixty years ago.”
I was born on the 16th of April, 1782, being the third son and seventh child of John Jerdan and Agnes Stuart, both of Kelso, in the county of Roxburgh, Scotland. If the spot of birth could implant a love of the beautiful in nature and perfection of pastoral scenery, that love must have been inherent in me, for I first saw the light in a room which hung over the Tweed, opposite to its junction with the Teviot, and certainly one of the sweetest rural localities
CHILDHOOD. | 9 |
My father was an only son, and descended from a long line of respectable landowners, of small estate. They held their property in feu, as deeds ranging over three hundred years bear witness, and appear to have been always ranked among the leading inhabitants of their native place. Desirous of improving, though, in fact, his easy temper and large family ultimately led to his diminishing his inheritance, he obtained the appointment of purser to an East Indiaman when a young man, and proceeded to London to enter upon his duties. But these were not the days of railroads or rapid intelligence, and whether the only son was indulged too long in his outfitting by maternal fondness and fears or not, certain it is that he did not arrive at his destination
10 | AN AUTOBIOGRAPHY. |
* My own dear and lamented second daughter, Mary, the late Mrs. Power, was so like Mr. Traill’s portrait of Mary Queen of Scots, that when it was brought to London and exhibited in St. George’s Hospital, she was frequently invited thither for the sake of the comparison, and much playful amusement derived from the circumstance. In a fancy-ball dress at Sir William Beechey’s, the resemblance was observed to be still more striking. |
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Noticing this legendary genealogy for all it is worth, and that is not more than a sample of very common Scottish nationality and aspiration to distinguished descent, I proceed to my earliest recollection of my father, who was then Baron Baillie of the township of Kelso and neighbourhood, a feudal office of consideration and magisterial authority, before the division of the country into county jurisdictions, with separate sheriffs, deputes, and sessions for the determination of civil suits and the trial of criminal or other offenders. The Duke of Roxburgh, as feudal lord, was thus represented and his powers exercised in the holding of weekly courts, sitting in the town hall, and administering justice with great simplicity of forms and investigation. As a picture not yet sixty years old, I may describe this somewhat primitive semicircular bench: raised on a dais at the upper end of the hall, the centre occupied by the Baillie, and about three yards from him, one end equally distinguished as the invariable seat of a harmless, tolerated idiot or person of weak intellect, named from the place of his birth Willy Hawick, and unquestionably the original of Walter Scott’s Goose Gibby. I am confirmed in this opinion not only by the vraisemblance of the portraits, but by the circumstance that when Scott resided, in his holiday boyhood and later youth, with his relation, Captain Scott of Rosebank, close to Kelso, both were frequent visitors at our cottage home, where Hawick was a
12 | AN AUTOBIOGRAPHY. |
Mr. Scott’s intimacy with the family continued for a number of years whenever he visited this part of the country, and there was even an early flirtation between him and my eldest sister, who did not like the “lame laddie.” But a more interesting proof of intimate acquaintance than boy and girl fancies, whether real or conjectural, is contained in a letter from the mighty minstrel to myself, in recommending his son Charles to my cicerone-attentions when he came to London, in which he tells me that my father was “the first person who encouraged his love of poetry!” My father, indeed, in his limited provincial sphere, stood almost alone for a genuine and cultivated taste for literature; and when, at a few years later than the time of Scott, I, either from disposition or imitation, entered upon an ardent boyish research into Ballad and Border lore, my indulgent parent warmly fanned the flame, and took me to many an old weaver, cobbler, and aged crone, from whom I learnt many scraps of traditional song and legend, out of which, even now in advanced years, I could
* See Appendix A. |
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My father was much respected and beloved. The lower classes looked to him as an indulgent friend, and from his position, though of barely competent income, he associated with the principal persons of the county: among these were John the “Book” Duke of Roxburgh, whose judicial substitute he was, and with whom I had the honour of taking my second day’s dinner in London, and being shown his noble library, now the resort of the Windham Club in St. James’s Square;—Sir George Douglas, of Springwood Park, the county member, from whom I also received much hospitable attention on my debut in town;—Mr. Kerr, the inheritor of Kippilaw, an eminent Scottish solicitor and parliamentary agent, residing in Golden Square, and one of my earliest and kindest friends. I well remember also Admiral William Elliot of Monteviot, the vanquisher of Thurot, Admiral William Dickson of Sydenham, and other Scotts, Elliots, and Dicksons; including General Dickson, the Admiral’s brother, whose admirable good-nature is engraven on my mind for ever, as a frequent visitor to our cottage, and delighting the young brood by the sweetest performance on the Irish pipe, and enjoying the pleasure he so kindly communicated. It might be that a favourite cat, apparently a fanatico per la musico, added to the attractions; for no sooner did the General commence playing, than it jumped upon his knee and sat there till every note was exhausted: and it may be mentioned as a curious anecdote in natural history, that the animal was so enamoured of the piping, as when taken from it into the garden as a test, it leapt through and broke a pane of glass in the parlour window, in order to regain its curious station. In fact, it realised the ancient sign of the Cat and Bagpipes; which
14 | AN AUTOBIOGRAPHY. |
Of my venerated parent I shall say little more. He died suddenly, in the night-time, after retiring to rest, in the autumn of 1796, when I was thirteen years old; and his funeral was attended by fifty or sixty of the most respectable inhabitants of the place and neighbourhood. I was at the time on a country visit, exploring the gipsy haunts of Yetholm and the legendary den of the Worm of Wormielaw.
He was, as I have observed, much beloved and respected; a gentleman of fine abilities thrown away in the indolence of a small provincial town, where he was the chief. Had he been called into the wide and busy world, he was well calculated to shine in it; but his habits were stirred by no stimulus. His residence was hospitably open to strangers, and particularly to the officers of regiments, then moving into quarters throughout the land. Those of English County regiments, such as the Sussex, were especially welcome, and I remember the first view the officers of this corps had from our garden, of the mode of washing by stoutlimbed lasses trampling on the clothes in tubs by the river side. Their surprise at the novelty in Scottish customs, was very entertaining; and their astonishment and shouts of laughter, so long-continued and vehement, that they would hardly let them come in to dinner.
The Mid Lothian Cavalry and the 21st or Royal Scotch Fusileers, were also visitors and on intimate terms with the family. With the former, indeed, it had all but formed an alliance; my eldest sister, then a very handsome girl, having attracted the attentions of two of its officers, Mr. John Hay (son of Dr. Thomas Hay of Edinburgh, and one of the finest looking young men in Scotland), and Mr.
CHILDHOOD. | 15 |
The distant retrospect of my father paints him to my mind’s eye, in a few prominent situations: ex. gr. as a fine looking portly gentleman, who from the summit of the abbey which adorns the title-page of this volume,* and to the insecurity of which he and his assessor, Willie Hawick, were wont to commit prisoners who often escaped before morning, fired a pistol as the signal for Lunardi’s balloon ascent,—the earliest impression left of my infant recollections, being then little beyond three years old; as presiding at the cross on the 4th of June, when around the bull-ring assembled the respectable inhabitants to drink bumpers to the health of King George III., and toss their glasses back over their heads to be profaned by no other toast, unless luckily caught by the crowd of boys and mechanics; as guiding me to parties for the collection of old poetry; as walking with Robert Burns and calling me from play to
* For this charming illustration of the lovely scene in which my childhood and school-life was spent, I am indebted to the liberal kindness of Mr. Adam Black, the distinguished publisher of Edinburgh; who, in thus placing one of Turner’s sweetest views at my disposal, has conferred one of those obligations which do honour to the intercourse between booksellers and authors.—W. J. |
16 | AN AUTOBIOGRAPHY. |
That I was not more familiar with my father’s domestic life arose from the circumstance of my having been adopted in childhood by a relative of my mother’s, wife of Mr. Walker the Supervisor of Excise for the town and adjacent district, an office of responsibility in those days, yet one to which I paid but little deference. For, in truth, the good man was very indulgent, and allowed his wife to pursue that course of training which is generally known by the appellation of “quite spoiling” the party in charge. And I dwell upon this matter especially, because it exercised much influence over all my future years. Having more pence than my companions, being allowed to loiter and lag behind school hours, and being pampered and petted with or without reason, I naturally grew up petulant and self-willed; and it is only extraordinary that the process did not render me also vicious
* See Appendix B. † See Appendix C. ‡ See Appendix D. |
CHILDHOOD. | 17 |
As portion of the lesson I have promised to give, I should mention another source of notice and praise which were well calculated to produce the feeling of vain-gloriousness in the infant mind. When still a child so young as to he unacquainted with my letters, I possessed an extraordinary faculty of the boy Biddle kind for figures, and could promptly render an account of arithmetical questions, such as were put to me by the gentlemen who were my father’s associates, and receive from them, in return, expressions of admiration and immense rewards, enabling me to scatter blessings round in the shape of gingerbread and sweetmeats. To be treated as a precocious phenomenon is a dangerous shoal, but as my talent left me as strangely as it had arrived, I was not long exposed to it. With the acquisition of the A, B, C, the gift of calculation suddenly departed, and from that hour to this a more unready reckoner than I have been never existed in the world. It has seemed as if all my capacity in this way had been exhausted between my birthday and its fourth anniversary; although I have not been unequal to high and abstract propositions of sufficient interest to enchain the faculties for their solution.
Another trait, and I close this Childish chapter. Owing to a premature cold bath in the Tweed, administered whilst yet unrecovered from small-pox, I was thrown into a condition of health so delicate, that during several years it was the nearest possible issue between death and life. This led to continued indulgences, and I only got through the struggle by the help of a long-eared nurse, whose milk at morn and eve was my chief sustenance. Towards the end
18 | AN AUTOBIOGRAPHY. |
For He whose spirit woke the dust of nations unto life—
That o’er the waste of barren earth spread flowers and fruitage rife—
Whose genius, like the sun, illumed the mighty realms of mind—
Had fled for ever from the fame, love, friendship of mankind!
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